Skip to content

Closed Door Romance

  • Authors Database Preview
  • Book Database Preview
  • Unlock Filters
  • Shop
  • For Authors
  • About Us
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Login
  • Authors Database Preview
  • Book Database Preview
  • Unlock Filters
  • Shop
  • For Authors
  • About Us
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Login

Things I Wrote About

By Kelsey Humphreys
KINDLE UNLIMITED
AUDIOBOOK
Level 3 Intimacy
Moderate Innuendo
Moderate Swearing
Zero Violence
No LGBTQ Content

Trigger Warnings

Addiction, Alcohol Abuse, Death of Parent, Grief

Book Details

Genre

Contemporary Romance, Romantic Comedy

Publisher

Self Published

Series

Heartlanders

Book #

3

Point of View

Dual First Person

Length

Novel
billionairecelebritychildhood friendscontemporary settingdestination weddingfirst loveforced proximityreunion romanceSecond Chance

Found a trope you love? → Tap it to explore more ❤️

Audiobook Details

Narrators

Narration Type

Dual

Synopsis

Sadie Canton writes America’s favorite romance novels. She’s created one hit happy ending after another, all while avoiding her own painful cliffhanger.

But she can’t avoid him anymore.

Her sister’s wedding is forcing her to face her demons, her secrets and most of all her best friend turned bitter enemy, Shep Riggs.

The boy she knew is gone and the man before her is angry, arrogant, competitive, and hot as the Caribbean sun bearing down on them. But Sadie planned for this. It’s time to be the hero of her own story, face her past and close that chapter of her life for good.

She’s ready for her villain and his jabs, his smirk, even his eightpack.

What she’s not ready for is Shep’s side of the story, and he’s determined to tell it — rough, unedited, and nowhere near The End.

***

This standalone Heartlanders novel, while fun and fast paced, spans almost twenty years. Fans of sweeping second-chance romances like Every Summer After, Love and Other Words, Ruthless Rival, and November 9 will adore this smart, steamy, full-length contemporary romance.

Prepare for hilarious banter, surprise twists, a happily ever after that more than makes up for almost throwing your kindle across the room, and a sisters group text thread you’ll wish you could join!

Where to Read

Amazon

*Affiliate link — I may earn a commission*

Reader Reviews

Have you read this book? Help other readers by leaving a review.

No reader reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Leave a Review

Reviews help other readers know what to expect from a book.
Please avoid spoilers and be respectful in your review.

More Books to Explore

Things I Overshared
Things I Forgot About
Things I Read About
Things I Remember
Things I Always Wanted

Featured Author Picks

The Doctor’s Devotion
My Heart to Keep
Rhyme, Riddle, and Romance
A Dragon Inside
To Be a Lady
Leather and Lies
Terms and Traditions
Waves of Redemption
Bigger Than Versace
Meet Me in the Keys
The Tale of Capri
Adrift in Time

Find Your Next Closed Door Romance

Stop guessing — find books that actually match your preferences
Filter by intimacy level, tropes, and more in seconds

Find books you'll love

2,700+ books • Filter by exact content levels • Built for closed door readers

KINDLE UNLIMITED
AUDIOBOOK
Amazon

*Affiliate link — I may earn a commission*

Things I Wrote About

By Kelsey Humphreys

Genre

Contemporary Romance, Romantic Comedy

Publisher

Self Published

Series

Heartlanders

Book #

3

Point of View

Dual First Person

Length

Novel

Narrator(s)

Narration Type

Dual
billionairecelebritychildhood friendscontemporary settingdestination weddingfirst loveforced proximityreunion romanceSecond Chance

Found a trope you love? → Tap it to explore more ❤️

Content Guide

This guide helps readers understand the content of this book.
Click the ⓘ icons to see how each level is defined.

Level 3 Intimacy
Moderate Innuendo
Moderate Swearing
Zero Violence
No LGBTQ Content

Trigger Warnings

Addiction, Alcohol Abuse, Death of Parent, Grief

Synopsis

Sadie Canton writes America’s favorite romance novels. She’s created one hit happy ending after another, all while avoiding her own painful cliffhanger.

But she can’t avoid him anymore.

Her sister’s wedding is forcing her to face her demons, her secrets and most of all her best friend turned bitter enemy, Shep Riggs.

The boy she knew is gone and the man before her is angry, arrogant, competitive, and hot as the Caribbean sun bearing down on them. But Sadie planned for this. It’s time to be the hero of her own story, face her past and close that chapter of her life for good.

She’s ready for her villain and his jabs, his smirk, even his eightpack.

What she’s not ready for is Shep’s side of the story, and he’s determined to tell it — rough, unedited, and nowhere near The End.

***

This standalone Heartlanders novel, while fun and fast paced, spans almost twenty years. Fans of sweeping second-chance romances like Every Summer After, Love and Other Words, Ruthless Rival, and November 9 will adore this smart, steamy, full-length contemporary romance.

Prepare for hilarious banter, surprise twists, a happily ever after that more than makes up for almost throwing your kindle across the room, and a sisters group text thread you’ll wish you could join!

Reader Reviews

Have you read this book? Help other readers by leaving a review.

No reader reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Leave a Review

Reviews help other readers know what to expect from a book.
Please avoid spoilers and be respectful in your review.

More Books to Explore

Things I Read About
Things I Forgot About
Things I Always Wanted
Things I Overshared
Things I Remember

Featured Author Picks

The Mysterious Case of the Missing Motive
The Doctor’s Devotion
A Dragon Inside
His Christmas Wish
Crushing On My Grumpy Billionaire Boss
Meet Me in the Keys
Line of Fire
Once Upon A Rose
Terms and Traditions
To Be a Lady
Anchor Cove
Collision Course

Find Your Next Closed Door Romance

Stop guessing — find books that actually match your preferences
Filter by intimacy level, tropes, and more in seconds

Find books you'll love

2700+ books • Filter by exact content levels • Built for closed door readers

Facebook Instagram
  • Authors Database Preview
  • Book Database Preview
  • Unlock Filters
  • Shop
  • For Authors
  • About Us
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Login
  • Authors Database Preview
  • Book Database Preview
  • Unlock Filters
  • Shop
  • For Authors
  • About Us
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Login
  • Terms & Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Affiliate Disclosure
  • Cookie Policy

Site design by Peak Creative Design

  • Authors Database Preview
  • Book Database Preview
  • Unlock Filters
  • Shop
  • For Authors
  • About Us
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Login
  • Authors Database Preview
  • Book Database Preview
  • Unlock Filters
  • Shop
  • For Authors
  • About Us
  • FAQ
  • Contact
  • Login
Facebook Twitter Youtube

Physical Intimacy Levels

Level 1

  • Holding hands or affectionate touching
  • Compliments or confessing love
  • Low-description kissing
  • Tender embraces or cuddling
  • Blushing and sighing
  • Non-descriptive discussions of sex
  • Established relationships
  • Fade to black if married
  • Any sexual encounters are only referred to from the past, not described or shown on page
 

Level 2

  • Touch that signals attraction
  • No touching in the underwear zone
  • Long kisses, lightly descriptive
  • Deeper kisses, tongue implied but not described
  • Feeling warm or flushed
  • Gasping, deep sighs, light growls or groans
  • Thinking or speaking about desire in a non-descriptive way
  • Fade to black for established relationships after a scene that matches this level, though this may be unpopular if they are not married
 

Level 3

 

  • Hands moving, still not in the underwear zone
  • French kissing with tongue described
  • Make-out sessions that still follow these guidelines
  • Feeling hot or sweaty
  • Heavier gasping, groaning, deep growls, or panting
  • More frantic moments and some loss of control
  • Male shirt may come off, but nothing else
  • Leg may straddle waist, but no mention of arousal
  • If characters lie down together, there should be little description of contact or movement
  • May happen in a bedroom or on a bed, but should be interrupted or end with a fade to black scene
  • Focus stays on the emotion
  • Fade to black should still happen between married couples or at the end of the book between engaged or committed couples

Innuendo Levels

Level 0 — None

  • No sexual innuendo
  • No suggestive humor
  • No crude or sexual jokes

Level 1 — Minimal

  • Minimal innuendo or double meanings
  • Light teasing
  • Mild crude or dad humor
  • Not frequent or strong

Level 2 — Moderate

  • Moderate suggestive humor
  • Double meanings
  • Sexual tension
  • May include crude or sexual jokes

Level 3 — Heavy

  • Heavy innuendo
  • Strong suggestive dialogue
  • Frequent crude or sexual humor

Swearing Levels

Zero

  • No swearing

Mild

  • Up to 10 uses of “hel*” or “dam*”

Moderate

  • 10+ uses of “hel*” or “dam*”
  • And/or use of bodily swear words like “shi*,” “as*,” etc.

Severe

  • 30+ swear words
  • And/or any use of the F-word one or more times

Violence Levels

Zero

  • No on-page violence

Mild

  • Violence is present without detail or only referenced vaguely
  • May briefly mention blood or injuries
  • Comparable to a G-rated movie

Moderate

  • Violence is more frequent and/or more detailed
  • Can be more intense
  • Injuries may be lightly described
  • Comparable to a PG-rated movie

Severe

  • Violence is more detailed and frequent
  • Blood may be mentioned and injuries may be described in detail
  • Comparable to a PG-13-rated movie

Intimacy Levels

Level 1

  • Holding hands/Affectionate touching
  • Compliments/confessing love
  • Low-description kissing
  • Tender embraces/cuddling
  • Blushing and sighing
  • Non-descriptive discussions of sex
  • Established relationships
  • Fade to black if married
  • Any sexual encounters from past only referred to, not described or on-screen

Level 2

  • Touch that signals attraction
  • No touching in underwear zone
  • Long kisses, lightly descriptive
  • Deeper kisses, tongue implied not described
  • Feel warm/flushed
  • Gasping, deep sighs, light growls and groans
  • Thinking/speaking about desire non-descriptive
  • Fade to black for established relationships after a scene that matches this level – but may be unpopular if not married

Level 3

  • Hands moving, still not in underwear zone
  • French kiss with tongue described
  • Make-out sessions still follow guidelines
  • Feel hot, sweating
  • Heavier gasping, groaning, deep growls, panting
  • More frantic and lose some control
  • Male shirt may come off, but nothing else
  • Leg may straddle waist, but no mention of arousal
  • If they lay down together anywhere, use little description of contact/moving
  • May happen in a bedroom or on a bed, but should be interrupted or end with fade to black scene. Keep focus on the emotion.
  • Fade to black should still happen between married couples or at the end of the book between engaged/committed couples.