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Things I Always Wanted

By Kelsey Humphreys
KINDLE UNLIMITED
AUDIOBOOK
Level 3 Intimacy
Moderate Innuendo
Moderate Swearing
Zero Violence
No LGBTQ Content

Trigger Warnings

Book Details

Genre

Contemporary Romance, Romantic Comedy

Publisher

Self Published

Series

Heartlanders

Book #

1

Point of View

Single First Person

Length

Novella
childhood friendsFriends to Loversopposites attract

Found a trope you love? → Tap it to explore more ❤️

Audiobook Details

Narrators

Narration Type

Single

Synopsis

Brilliant, introverted, painfully logical med school student Sandra Hayes realizes she might finally be able to move on from her childhood crush with her hot new Anatomy T.A. The only problem is, she doesn’t know how to flirt or even date. Who better to teach her than her outgoing, magnetic best friend Jonny – who happens to be the aforementioned crush?…Anyone. Almost anyone else would have been a better option.

My shock in this moment is illogical.

Years ago, I analyzed the data sets—our friendship, our emails, my emotional turmoil, Jonny’s lack thereof—and there was only one logical conclusion to be found. It arrived in my consciousness suddenly, during what I dramatically named my Summer of Anguish. (Dramatics are to be expected of a seventeen-year-old girl.) I sat up on the couch in my dorm room in a moment of scientific clarity.

I was irrationally in love with my best friend, Jonny Canton.
And that love was going to ruin my life.

Now, here I am, my legs itching from contact dermatitis due to the dust on the engineered wood floor. I should not be surprised. Yet I am. Because I never expected or imagined this.

Where to Read

Amazon

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KINDLE UNLIMITED
AUDIOBOOK
Amazon

*Affiliate link — I may earn a commission*

Things I Always Wanted

By Kelsey Humphreys

Genre

Contemporary Romance, Romantic Comedy

Publisher

Self Published

Series

Heartlanders

Book #

1

Point of View

Single First Person

Length

Novella

Narrator(s)

Narration Type

Single
childhood friendsFriends to Loversopposites attract

Found a trope you love? → Tap it to explore more ❤️

Content Guide

This guide helps readers understand the content of this book.
Click the ⓘ icons to see how each level is defined.

Level 3 Intimacy
Moderate Innuendo
Moderate Swearing
Zero Violence
No LGBTQ Content

Trigger Warnings

Synopsis

Brilliant, introverted, painfully logical med school student Sandra Hayes realizes she might finally be able to move on from her childhood crush with her hot new Anatomy T.A. The only problem is, she doesn’t know how to flirt or even date. Who better to teach her than her outgoing, magnetic best friend Jonny – who happens to be the aforementioned crush?…Anyone. Almost anyone else would have been a better option.

My shock in this moment is illogical.

Years ago, I analyzed the data sets—our friendship, our emails, my emotional turmoil, Jonny’s lack thereof—and there was only one logical conclusion to be found. It arrived in my consciousness suddenly, during what I dramatically named my Summer of Anguish. (Dramatics are to be expected of a seventeen-year-old girl.) I sat up on the couch in my dorm room in a moment of scientific clarity.

I was irrationally in love with my best friend, Jonny Canton.
And that love was going to ruin my life.

Now, here I am, my legs itching from contact dermatitis due to the dust on the engineered wood floor. I should not be surprised. Yet I am. Because I never expected or imagined this.

Reader Reviews

Have you read this book? Help other readers by leaving a review.

No reader reviews yet. Be the first to share your thoughts!

Leave a Review

Reviews help other readers know what to expect from a book.
Please avoid spoilers and be respectful in your review.

More Books to Explore

Things I Forgot About
Things I Remember
Things I Read About
Things I Wrote About
Things I Overshared

Featured Author Picks

Malformation
Fireworks at First Sight
The Doctor’s Devotion
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A Dream of Magic
Reason To Be
Anchor Cove
The Mysterious Case of the Missing Motive
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Rhyme, Riddle, and Romance
Waves of Redemption
Leather and Lies

Find Your Next Closed Door Romance

Stop guessing — find books that actually match your preferences
Filter by intimacy level, tropes, and more in seconds

Find books you'll love

2700+ books • Filter by exact content levels • Built for closed door readers

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Physical Intimacy Levels

Level 1

  • Holding hands or affectionate touching
  • Compliments or confessing love
  • Low-description kissing
  • Tender embraces or cuddling
  • Blushing and sighing
  • Non-descriptive discussions of sex
  • Established relationships
  • Fade to black if married
  • Any sexual encounters are only referred to from the past, not described or shown on page
 

Level 2

  • Touch that signals attraction
  • No touching in the underwear zone
  • Long kisses, lightly descriptive
  • Deeper kisses, tongue implied but not described
  • Feeling warm or flushed
  • Gasping, deep sighs, light growls or groans
  • Thinking or speaking about desire in a non-descriptive way
  • Fade to black for established relationships after a scene that matches this level, though this may be unpopular if they are not married
 

Level 3

 

  • Hands moving, still not in the underwear zone
  • French kissing with tongue described
  • Make-out sessions that still follow these guidelines
  • Feeling hot or sweaty
  • Heavier gasping, groaning, deep growls, or panting
  • More frantic moments and some loss of control
  • Male shirt may come off, but nothing else
  • Leg may straddle waist, but no mention of arousal
  • If characters lie down together, there should be little description of contact or movement
  • May happen in a bedroom or on a bed, but should be interrupted or end with a fade to black scene
  • Focus stays on the emotion
  • Fade to black should still happen between married couples or at the end of the book between engaged or committed couples

Innuendo Levels

Level 0 — None

  • No sexual innuendo
  • No suggestive humor
  • No crude or sexual jokes

Level 1 — Minimal

  • Minimal innuendo or double meanings
  • Light teasing
  • Mild crude or dad humor
  • Not frequent or strong

Level 2 — Moderate

  • Moderate suggestive humor
  • Double meanings
  • Sexual tension
  • May include crude or sexual jokes

Level 3 — Heavy

  • Heavy innuendo
  • Strong suggestive dialogue
  • Frequent crude or sexual humor

Swearing Levels

Zero

  • No swearing

Mild

  • Up to 10 uses of “hel*” or “dam*”

Moderate

  • 10+ uses of “hel*” or “dam*”
  • And/or use of bodily swear words like “shi*,” “as*,” etc.

Severe

  • 30+ swear words
  • And/or any use of the F-word one or more times

Violence Levels

Zero

  • No on-page violence

Mild

  • Violence is present without detail or only referenced vaguely
  • May briefly mention blood or injuries
  • Comparable to a G-rated movie

Moderate

  • Violence is more frequent and/or more detailed
  • Can be more intense
  • Injuries may be lightly described
  • Comparable to a PG-rated movie

Severe

  • Violence is more detailed and frequent
  • Blood may be mentioned and injuries may be described in detail
  • Comparable to a PG-13-rated movie

Intimacy Levels

Level 1

  • Holding hands/Affectionate touching
  • Compliments/confessing love
  • Low-description kissing
  • Tender embraces/cuddling
  • Blushing and sighing
  • Non-descriptive discussions of sex
  • Established relationships
  • Fade to black if married
  • Any sexual encounters from past only referred to, not described or on-screen

Level 2

  • Touch that signals attraction
  • No touching in underwear zone
  • Long kisses, lightly descriptive
  • Deeper kisses, tongue implied not described
  • Feel warm/flushed
  • Gasping, deep sighs, light growls and groans
  • Thinking/speaking about desire non-descriptive
  • Fade to black for established relationships after a scene that matches this level – but may be unpopular if not married

Level 3

  • Hands moving, still not in underwear zone
  • French kiss with tongue described
  • Make-out sessions still follow guidelines
  • Feel hot, sweating
  • Heavier gasping, groaning, deep growls, panting
  • More frantic and lose some control
  • Male shirt may come off, but nothing else
  • Leg may straddle waist, but no mention of arousal
  • If they lay down together anywhere, use little description of contact/moving
  • May happen in a bedroom or on a bed, but should be interrupted or end with fade to black scene. Keep focus on the emotion.
  • Fade to black should still happen between married couples or at the end of the book between engaged/committed couples.